I’ve been dealing with a situation that’s been somewhat traumatizing to me and has gotten me very depressed and experiencing feelings of self-hatred and shame (having SAD doesn’t help). I became so depressed all I could do was lie in bed and sleep or just mope around and do nothing except wallow in self pity. I lost all motivation to write anything at all. I prayed for answers and clarity on this situation, and now that I finally understand the reason this thing triggered me so much, I’m finally starting to feel a little better about it.
I’m sorry, but I’m not prepared to say what the situation is. I’m not ill nor is anyone close to me sick. I didn’t lose my job. No one died. Nothing “bad” happened. It’s purely a thing that has to do with my mental disorders and is probably something that wouldn’t bother a normal person nearly so much but sent me hurtling down a mental black hole.
I have therapy tomorrow where I will be talking about it. The only person that knows exactly what’s going on with me right now is my therapist. I hope I come away feeling almost back to normal (normal for me, that is).
I still don’t know how much I’ll feel like posting, though.