A gift for Chair Girl, Part 2.

gifts_chairgirl

I didn’t have a lot of money to spend on Chair Girl’s gift, but I think I found a few things she will like. I wanted to give her my old copy of “A Wrinkle In Time” by Madeleine L’Engle. This was one of my favorite books as a child. I was sure I still had my childhood copy around, but I couldn’t find it anywhere (which really annoys me because I have so few things that I had as a child). I did happen to have a newer edition of another childhood favorite of mine, “Island of the Blue Dolphins,” which in some ways is more appropriate.

I got her a card too. Pictured is the inside and the outside. I wrote a short note inside the card:

Sweetie,
I’m sorry I haven’t always been there for you. I promise to do better. I hope you like the gifts. This book was a favorite of mine as a child because the girl in it is strong, independent, and full of love. You deserve these gifts because you are strong, beautiful, and full of love.
Love, Big ____

card_outside card_inside

At Dollar General I went to the toy section and picked up a glow wand and a glow-in-the-dark keychain-making kit. I think she’ll have fun with the keychain kit, because it includes a lanyard. I remember making lanyards when I went to summer camp. I packed everything up in a fun animal print bag with multi-colored tissue paper. I think I’m going to bring the package with me to my therapy session this week and have her open the gift there. Sure, it will be a little awkward, but I just think this is how it should be done.

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17 thoughts on “A gift for Chair Girl, Part 2.

  1. Oh my goodness… you have given me an idea.

    I cherished my childhood toys and intended to pass them down to my own children. But my mother threw away every single thing I owned after she put me in the mental hospital when I was fourteen.

    About five years ago, I was looking on eBay at toys from the 1950s. I found two dolls exactly like my favorite dolls that I had when I was little. The auction description for my most favorite doll said that it had never been opened, never played with. Although that doll, a Horseman Saucy Walker, was manufactured and sold in 1955, it was essentially “new in the box.”

    I bid on those two dolls, and I won them. The packages, one large and one small, soon arrived in the mail. This was almost five years ago, and I have never opened the packages. Every time I started to, I just couldn’t. I don’t even know why. The two unopened doll packages are still sitting right here beside my bed, still wrapped up in the brown paper they were mailed in.

    I think I need to do something like you are doing with these dolls…. if I can.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh, open them! I feel as excited as you do about it. And post pictures, please? My mother threw away all my childhood toys too…or gave them away. Sometimes I feel so sad about that…it may be silly but she has zero sentimentality and it hurts sometimes. I look at normal mothers who get sentimental about their kids’ childhoods but mine never did. 😦

      Liked by 2 people

    1. I’d read about chair work which I know is commonly used for people with C-PTSD, BPD, and NPD (maybe other disorders too) and I thought it sounded pretty silly. But it really does work. It’s powerful stuff.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. That’s interesting. I recently found out I have a Critic, who protects me from having to feel shame and is constantly criticizing Chair girl, but is also what keeps me from becoming too narcissistic. If I go too far into either “weakness/vulnerability” or “invulnerability/narcissism” the Critic keeps me in line. I feel like I’m walking a very thin tightrope all the time and that is what causes me to be so stressed out and depressed. One of the goals in my therapy is for the critic to be less critical and allow me more leeway in both directions and give me more freedom. So the Critic is learning how to give “construction criticism” instead of punitive judgment. What we do not want to happen is for the Critic to go away! Because then narcissism could kick in. Don’t want that either!

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