1. I just woke from a dream in which my mother called and said:
You never wanted to listen to us. We tried to guide you but you always were the rebel, ignoring our advice. Your life would have been so much easier and happier if you had stuck with the tried and true…the tried and true…
This is exactly the sort of thing she used to say all the time in real life. But there was no pleasing her, ever.
2. My therapist sent me an email with a revised schedule. There’s something going on with his family up north where he has to leave town for a couple of weeks in April and May. He also had to change other dates to different days. I know it’s probably got something to do with a recent death in his family (mother? father? someone else? I never asked) but I can’t help feeling like I’m being jerked around. What if he has to move back up there and can’t see me anymore? It worries me. I will fall to pieces if that happens when I’m feeling this attached and vulnerable.